Reon Lin, Colorless Soul

[Reon]

R E A L · W O R L D

Name Reon Lin
Age 16
Gender Male
Appearance
Black short hair and black eyes, he is a Chinese, so he has nothing special on his appearance. He has a fairly light and smooth skin, and his height is average which a teen should have. Somehow, he is a good-looking boy because he has a childish face, or we can say it, a girl's face. This means he is cute and adorable in some way, so many girls like to talk with him. For his clothing, he prefers anything but old-fashioned.

Personality
Reon is a shy boy but he is actually very kind that he likes to help people. He is a responsible boy who will take his responsibility very serious. He feels guilty easily when he is doing something wrong. Although he has a girlish face, he is brave and courageous, and he faces his challenges very serious. In short, he is always serious, all ways. He can said to be a quiet and calm boy, but this does not mean he does not talk.

He is not an intelligent boy, stupid neither, but he wants to be perfect, and so he is finding for 'speed', 'speed' for learning fast, 'speed' for running fast, 'speed' for understanding fast, so he can become a perfect person.

History
A sad story between Reon and a girl who was already disappeared from the world forever, however, the girl has changed Reon's fate before she left. The story started from a rainy day, Reon was running back on the halfway to his house after school, of course he was wearing a raincoat. Suddenly, he rushed into a girl who was wearing the same school uniform with him. The girl got all wet because she fell down to the ground. Reon took her up quickly and trying to apologize, but the girl said nothing, taking her umbrella from the ground and walked away. Yet, Reon saw her legs was bleeding so he ran to the girl again. "I'm so sorry about that."

"Its nothing." the girl replied, but Reon did not care. He carried her up to his back and ran to his house. On the way running back to his house, the girl was trying to get down from him, but she felt the pain because her legs were bleeding, for sure. Reon put the girl down to the sofa and took the medicine box quickly. He knew she would misunderstanding so he just kept quiet and was just taking care of the wounds on her legs. "Thank you."

"Oh, its my fault that I hurt you." Reon said "Anyway, I'm Reon."

"The name's Felicia." the girl said her name, and after that, Reon became friends with her. Days after that day, Reon and Felicia became very good friends, and even that day would come, Felicia decided to use the wire to connect her Neuro Linker with Reon's one. However, Felicia installed a file into Reon's Neuro Linker without telling him, but the fate of Reon has already changed when the file has installed. Until half of a year has passed, Felicia moved to Americia due to her father has been transferred there to work. Reon felt very sad, because he might not have chance to meet here again, and the secret in Reon was still hidden. He wanted her so bad, and he wanted to start again, if he could meet her again in Japan.

Wonder if someone can guide Reon to the secret of the file installed in his Neuro Linker? Actually, Reon does not have many friends, but Felicia was his first very best friend, and even they could said to be a couple. This is all about love, but an unfaithful love.

Points of Distinction
Since Reon has played many VRMMORPG when he was still a young boy, he is a skilled fighter in virtual worlds instead of real world. He was thinking to become a professional player of all games, so he was always training in games, and he has fighting styles include martial art, swordsmanship, marksmanship and others.

V I R T U A L · N E T W O R K


B U R S T · L I N K

Name Colorless Soul
Appearance
Somehow, Reon's duel avatar, Colorless Soul has two colors instead of one, and that two colors are considered rare, black and white. Unlike some humanoid duel avatars, Colorless Soul is a whole robotic duel avatar, with a black pearl located in the center of its chest. It is armored with a big shield on its left arm, and Colorless Soul does not get any damage when only the shield gets hit. Therefore, the shield can be used to block attack from its opponents.

Explanation
Colorless Soul reflects the personality and the love story of Reon, Reon always want to be perfect, and so he wants to learn fast in his study, run fast in the sports, and understanding fast in things in the world. The color of Colorless Soul, black represents his hope, that he wants to meet her again; White represents his wish, that he wants to start again with her, and this is all about love. She is the only trauma that he is keeping in his heart and is memorable. Sometimes he is even crying before he sleeps at night. In another terms, we can say that the world in Reon's heart is colorless, because he felt hopeless. Both black and white can also represent his desperation and sadness about losing his loved one.

Parent Felicia Chen (Love Angel)
Stats Total 8000
Melee - 800 (D)
Ranged - 0 (F)
Defense - 800 (D)
Speed - 4000 (A++) + 25% = 5000 (S)
Dexterity - 1600 (C)
Killer Gauge - 800 (D)

Killer Move
Colorless Soul's special move, Lightning Shadow, it is required to consume a full killer gauge to activate. Colorless Soul's speed is doubled for 10 seconds and possesses the speed that nobody can follow the speed with their naked eyes. In this 10 seconds, Colorless Soul will attack the target at all directions with punches and kicks for 100 times, since it possesses the speed of light. To be strict, this special move consumes only 70% to the target's health. However, Colorless Soul possesses a slow killer gauge that is hard to be fulled.

Ability
Colorless Soul, its movement and reaction speed get enhanced for 25% and this makes its speed reaches the maximum of a duel avatar can do. It can dodge very easily and is hard to be hit. However, Colorless Soul is extremely weak on his attack and defense, since its speed consumed large amount of stat points.

[Dranes]

I can already tell you Dragonlord isn't a real word nor will it be approved.

Wip but I may as well make a comment now before further mistakes on the name is made (seeing as how it fits in/how important it is).

[Destination]

I'm sorry, I need to correct the other work of your name as well. 'White' is an unknown colour even to this point; the trauma, desires, and wishes behind White and Black are speculative at best. No concrete evidence exists, so using White is frowned upon by me in my case.

The other point is that precisely because you use White, 'Knight', which suggests a close-range fighting technique or heavily armoured fighter, tallies much better with the colour Blue. Canonically the Blue King himself is Blue Knight. So as far as we're talking AW knights, it would refer to such CQC types and not the proverbial white knight in shining armour.

Take your time to think through this, and refer to the stickied threads for help if need be.

[Platinum Blader]

This is merely a suggestion, but regarding Dragon Knights, Dragonlord and such, you could ALMOST be a dragoon.

Nice picture from White Knight Chronicles.

[Dranes]

Except Dragoons come from Final Fantasy and real life dragoons are a type of cavalry. Dragoon refering to spear users was a name invested/used for Final Fantasy.

So, you're not going to be a FF Dragoon in the land of AW (at least sure as hell not with the Dragoon name).

[Reon]

~
D O N E
B U M P
P L E A S E
C H E C K
T H A N K S
~

[Dranes]

On second thought, I'm going to let the mods handle this one.

[Destination]

There is so much things that are dead wrong or contradicting that it would be wrong to simply dismiss this sheet as wrong. Let me begin in sequence.

Personality - This point is deeply connected to your History, and by looking at both, I have two words dfor you: Gary Stu. Your history doesn't explain why is he shy nor likes to help people. There is no explanation as to why he desires speed in three different ways and perfection being his goal. All you wrote was how he obtained Brain Burst from a mysterious girl, with not much elaboration on how she 'changed (his) fate forever.' There is actually a lot of missing elements from Reon's history that fails to give me a good understanding of why he acted the way he did to Felicia.

Points of Distinction - you've made him to be a hardcore VRMMO player. He's basically good in everything, based on your last sentence " he has fighting styles include martial art, swordsmanship, marksmanship and others." Now before I go all out and question the ability of a non-Burst Linker to accomplish all that and still be a sociable human being, I'm also wondering what drives Reon to have such a strong drive to be strong in the virtual world. How does this relate to his wish(es) to be fast? Again, there are missing elements.

Colourless Soul:

A big no on this one. Even if a 'colourless' avatar exists, (Aqua Current) it does NOT mean that 'colourless' can be a colour! Your explanation is even more lacking and meaningless; a two-coloured avatar has indeed appeared in canon, the red and white Ardor Maiden, but she had a proper colour word, Ardor. Now before you use 'Gray,' I must caution that grey avatars have never showed up and their properties are also completely unknown.

Colourless Soul (henceforth CS) has a shield that protects him from all damage, you say, but his stats show A++ for speed and D for defense? Dude. Get your ideas sorted out. Even Diamond Dash is better than CS in this aspect by having a reasonable explanation for the A++ rank speed.

Your explanation about the black and white in Reon's heart is cute, but sorry. As stated, black and white are unknown at this point, and a desire to be with someone as you suggest should result in something entirely different, like flight perhaps. (Haruyuki wanted to reach out to his parents no matter what and where they were.) And then you pulled it longer by saying he was hopeless; what caused him to feel so? Where did he lose his hope, and when?

Can you nail down the speed of Lightning Shadow to something more concrete? Twice his normal speed, or speed of light? Either way, this is ridiculously overpowered to begin with if it is stated to be faster than the naked eye can follow.

I am also assuming that CS also has a passive ability named 'Colourless Soul' since you also put it under his ability. Once again, I call BS. Boosting his reaction speed to the maximum of a duel avatar? Weren't those honed by his experience in playing VRMMOs already? As for dodging easily and being hard to hit, holding a shield and yet being weak on defense?

All in all. I have to commend you for coming up with a history all at once, but I have to give this a thumbs down, plainly. There are tons of missing elements, the DA itself is silly, and the abilities have monrelation to the wish of Reon nor his (unspecified) trauma.

[Vixxy]

....I call ditto with that tus said.

[R4yleonard]

Aside from what Tus said, your name doesn't fit the Chinese origin (Reon is a rare variant of the boy's name Ryan, which is of Gaelic origin and means 'king'. You can read it here : http://www.babynames.co.uk/meaning_origin_name_Reon.htm). Thus, you have to explain this in your history, or change your name. You also have to explain his background more, since your character is a chinese in Japan. Also, the name Felicia is uncommon in Japan, you should explain this in your history (for example, by describing her like a European, which could justify the name)

[Destination]

Reon made his account on Oct 4, he last logged in Oct 5.

It's been nearly two months now, and despite an email and an announcement giving extra grace to update his character to the new stat system, he hasn't made anything new. He does not have a second account.

By this reasoning, it seems safe to say that he would not be coming back, so I'm now moving his character to Negative Examples.

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